The mildly annoying sounds of frenzied quacking are not generally associated with chili, unless, of course you’re around a bunch of rude juvenile-types, and then it’s only expected.
Quacks could be heard inadvertently as the Duck Blind guys quack-talked their smack talk to the other chili booths across the way.
Husband and I sampled our way through each booth to try out every unique flavor, texture and style (yes, chili has style) of chili imaginable. Each had its own personality, too. Some were on the salty side, some were sweet-ish, some were colorful and laced with cilantro or bell peppers. Some were all about the meat. I sampled one that was practically like eating a steak, which thrilled the beef-lover in me. This same chili also had a smoky flavor that floated my pallet’s boat. I thought for sure it would be a winner with me.
Since I wasn’t asked to be a judge (although I never applied for the job), I decided to make up my own contest. One lucky recipient would get the CowDiva’s Blogger’s Choice Award; I had it printed up special, and placed in a protective sleeve so that no chili accidents could mar its surface.
I was on the lookout for my fave.
The Smoky One made my list. There were others I was anxious to try, where I knew the chefs and was rooting for them. I would have loved to have given them my little award, but I had to be true to my tastebuds.
Would it be Cory Mikhals, the People’s Choice year after year? Would it be Talkin’ Tom’s? His was the first chili I sampled, and I really liked it. (My spouse couldn’t compliment the concoction enough.) Would it be the other Tom, Mr. Mudd of Wheelers Handout? I got an unauthorized sample of his chili before the official sampling even got underway, and liked that one, too. It was pure, simple, tasty, and something I could sit down to a meal with.
Quack, quack, quack went the Duck Blind guys. We could hear them the entire time. They must’ve used the duck call every five minutes or so, just to remind us they were still there. The other contestants often responded with their cowbells or dinner triangles in an effort to drown out the ducks, which was amusing.
Saving Chief Bill Augsburger’s, Tom Mudd’s, and Cory Mikhals chili for last, we made our way around to them, but met with an unexpected snag: A colorful chili with beef, peppers, cilantro, and bursting with flavor. It made my mouth happy. I guiltily wished for seconds.
“Is that…celery salt I detect in there?” I asked the chef. Wrong. Onion salt and something else I couldn’t pronounce, but that sounded mega-gourmet. All I knew was that I liked it and wanted more.
Chief Augsburger’s chili had a richness to it that I couldn’t put my finger on at first. Something was going on in there; those undertones of beef…aha! Beef bouillon. I asked him about it on the sly. He said he was impressed; it had exactly four cubes of bouillon in it. I told him my next dream job is that of a food blogger. (That’s not a lie).
I swung by for a second sampling of Tom Mudd’s famous chili, and liked it again just fine. My husband enjoyed it, as well.
Quack, quack, quack, came the reminder. ‘Try our chili. Remember our chili,’ it seemed to say. Thanks, Duck Blind guys. Now stop it.
Cory Mikhals’ chili was a fiesta of bell peppers, tender meat and the perfect amount of beans. It smelled good. It looked good. It tasted good.
“Have some toppings!” his associate told us. Cilantro. Cheese. Sour cream. Heaven. They knew just how to take a great experience and make it even better. No wonder they’ve won People’s Choice so often.
Husband and I shared our opinions on the winners. He liked Talkin’ Tom’s chili the best. I knew the one I liked, much as I hated to disappoint the others. Quack, quack, quack.
I humbly approached the Duck Blind guys with their Blogger’s Choice Award. Yeah, their quacking was annoying, but their chili kicked bean. I would’ve taken home the pot if I could’ve talked them into it. They did, however, talk me into trying their red hot ghost pepper chili. I had to sign an actual waiver to taste it; no kidding. It had a respectable heat and really wasn’t half bad, but not something I’d want to slurp down in front of the TV set anytime soon…or even sample again for a while. Zoo-wee.
The moment of truth had arrived. Throngs of us waited anxiously as the announcers gave us the golden words. Who would win?
It went something like this:
“The Best Decorated Booth this year, voted by our illustrious panel of judges: Team Number Sixteen, the Duck Blind Chili booth!”
(More quacks from the duck calls as a response)
“Most Enthusiastic Team: Team #3 Goat Gap Gazette from Texas!”
(This was the guy in the western mountain man getup, complete with the dead animal on the head. Pictures to follow.)
“The People’s Choice Award ($100)
Team Number One: Talkin Tom’s Bigmouth Chili, that’s Tom Laney… You must’ve talked them into it, Tom!”
“Salsa Competition: 3rd place ($50) Team #10, Oregon Trail Competition.
2nd Place ($75) Team #3 Goat Gap Gazette Chili and
1st Place ($100) Joe Barrett, High Country Chili!”
“Chili Verde:
3rd Place: Alicia Garcia, Alicia’s ‘but’ Chili
2nd Place: Bob Wetzel, Bronco Bob’s bun bustin chili and
1st place #10 Oregon Trail Competition Team!”
“Red Chili Competition:
3rd Place ($300)…
(at this point, the announcer was being funny)
“I get to have to try to pronounce all the names…Cory Mik- hallis?”
“---Mikhals!” corrected the other announcer, although she knew he knew Cory Mikhals, just like the rest of us did.
“ Number eleven, Sinners and Saints!” the announcer declared.
“2nd ($400) Bronco Bob’s Chili with Bob Wetcel!
And the 1st place winner, who will now be qualified for the World Chili Cookoff, is Talkin Tom’s Bigmouth Chili, Tom Laney! This year’s Red Chili Champion is Talkin’ Tom!”
My husband was right. Drat. I hate it when that happens. But Talkin’ Tom did make one mighty fine chili, and he deserved to win.
The Duck Blind guys were standing nearby and loudly announced, “Well, at least WE got Blogger’s Choice!”
Right on, Duck Blind guys. Or maybe I should say quack on.
For photos, see:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/amy_larson/
Get your tickets to the Snake River Stampede.
It’s your rodeo.
http://www.snakeriverstampede.com/
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